How dating conversations are changing me…
I've been very reflective over the last couple of days about this new relationship I'm exploring. I've met this amazing man. I'm trying not to get too ahead of myself, I've only known him for a little over a week. This has been an interesting experience and I want to share some lessons I've learned in the last week-ish. Because we're both dating others and really like and respect each other, we've set some ground rules if you will, that we're calling agreements. One of them is brutal honesty, his words not mine, but the spirit of it keeps us talking about everything. It's really blossomed into something special. It is in that vein of brutal honesty today.
Honestly, I have craved this kind of relationship. I've found that the more he's open and honest about his feelings, even those ones that could be construed as “negative”, I'm willing to be open about mine. There is extreme trust between us which has created this space of comfortable openness. I've struggled in the past to be fully myself and fully open with those I'm dating. I get uncomfortable in my skin and don't show my true self. We've talked about the layers of this and it's led me to be a better communicator and more open to exploring those uncomfortable feelings, saying hello to them and acknowledging that I'm feeling something. When he first talked about seeing other people, there was a I'm going to call it a pang because that's how I described it to him. I was so grateful he brought this up, even with the pang (I'm human, right??). It opened the door for us to talk more about what we desire in relationship and how we want to be. It gave us permission to feel the “pang” and share it with each other our experience of those feelings.
I feel like not only is this experience expanding me to be a better potential parter, but also a better friend and coach. Exploring ways to create radically open containers for people to show up with all of their feelings. I know Healing the Heart has been a container for that because with our grief comes a multitude and great depth of emotion, but expanding that into coaching others, the content created for email, blog, social media and even the tiny courses.
Have you had an experience that supported your growth in other areas of your life?
